Gobblin'

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Everyone knows about goblins. They’re violent and stupid little green guys who with just enough brain cells to know what they’re doing and black enough hearts not to care. They live in fantastic worlds where wizards battle dragons, kingdoms rise and fall, and armies of swordsmen clash to save the world from evil. All the while, there’s always goblins looting corpses and stealing cabbages. When the higher races grew tired of the chaotic creatures so obnoxious that even the forces of evil didn’t want them around, they banded together to form a spell so powerful that it would reach across the entire realm. With what was essentially a magical, interdimensional eviction notice, every single goblin was hurled through time and space until they landed in what they would come to know as their new home. There were no humans or elves there, but those that had lived there before had left behind a strange world ravaged by war. The least cowardly of the goblins started to prod at the mysterious devices until they roared to life and the goblins cheered to realize their fate! This world had guns and cars, bazookas and robots! Things that exploded if you poked them enough! Exciting mutants and bombed out apartments that were MUCH cozier than any goblin hut. The goblins had a whole world of abandoned toys to discover, many of which could kill their fellow goblin from twenty paces away. The goblins ran wholeheartedly into their new world, wanting to be the first to discover the strangest mysteries, deadliest weapons and tastiest expired snack cakes of the world they would call Goblin House. The humans were gone from this place. The goblins would thrive in their ruins.

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